because we can't all work retail, honey

showslow:

(via)

This image makes me feel hope for some reason. I suppose this reminds me how we are often fearful of things which may not necessary hurt us, if we just be brave for a short while and trust.

(via whiskeysoaked)

I opened up Netflix, and just found that they decided to carry Wallander. THAT MEANS MORE TOM HIDDLESTON. I CAN WATCH THE HIDDLES AND MARVEL AT HIS BEAUTY.

I shouted “Fuck yeah, fuuuuuuck yeaaaa!” and whooped for almost a minute into the (thankfully) empty house, not even joking.

(via whiskeysoaked)

whiskeysoaked:

nearly two years later and I still feel the same way

whiskeysoaked:

I lack adequate coping mechanisms to deal with the uncertainty that my life is comprised of at the moment. 

Oh God, why is this so true?

hollow-gram:

Saturday Night Live 36x12

“When you talk about guns you always hear a lot about the Second Amendment and the Founding Fathers, and what they would say if they were here. Well, I for one think that if the Founding Fathers were here today, they would be super freaked out by cars. You can talk to them all you want about the Second Amendment, and they would just yell, ‘What are all these metal beasts doing rolling down the thoroughfare?’ And you’d tell them, ‘Those are cars’. And then you’d try to talk to them about militias and they would scream, ‘How can you speak of militias when steel dragons fly through the sky?’ And you’d say, ‘Those are airplanes.’ But even if they could wrap their heads around that they would eventually ask, ‘Why are all the slaves out?’ And they would think that. You can groan all you want, but they would think that.

And yes, the Founding Fathers wanted you to have the right to bear arms, but the guys who wrote that would pee through all eight layers of their pants if they saw what guns are now. In 1787 shooting a bullet was slightly faster than throwing one. If you wanted to be bulletproof in 1787 you put on a heavy coat. So with that in mind, I’m all about Americans having guns as long as they’re the muskets from 1787 that take forever to load.”

I missed this, but I love it so much.

(via reductosshrinkgun)

somethinglceproductions:

bang bang

(via cynthiaville)

tyleroakley:

cumsoline:

fresnel149:

spooksoline:

fresnel149:

spooksoline:

sordidfantasy:

ghost-punk:

i cant believe someone scanned a poptart

I can’t believe someone scanned the least tasty poptart.

“The least tasty poptart.” excuse yoself, mahfucka. Cherry is the SHIT.

It’s funny that you like cherry so much and yet you can’t tell that this is strawberry. Cherry has all-red sprinkles.

I’m colorblind, you ableist prick.

THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDN’T CORRECT SOMEONE WITH FACTS YOU CAN’T KNOW. GAWD.

CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE, CIS SCUM.

(via sincerelyyoursthebreakfestclub)

So I was recently browsing Tumblr when I saw a gif set of cats stumbling around in what seems a drunken stupor. It’s kind of funny. But then it reminds me of the worst drinking event of my college career and the reason why I can’t eat Cheerios.

It’s a long one, as fair warning.

Basically, one night I decided to make the worst decision of my college career and tried to finish off almost two liters of Svedka that had been in my freezer for a while. So I invited a dozen of folks to kill the bottle. It ended up being myself and only three other friends. Should have known things may have ended badly at that point. Math is understandably foggy, but I took at least 8 shots of vodka, plus my individual mixed drink and some additional shots (three or four…?) towards game penalties in a little over two hours. Did I mention I hadn’t eaten in about eight hours?

Oh and to add insult to injury, we started drinking around 3:45 AM. But hey, we finished a little after 6:00 AM so that was good, right? Well, maybe. Then again… my first class was at 10 AM.

Needless to say, waking up three hours later was worse than Bubba Sparxxx ugly. I tried to eat some lasagna that I’d baked earlier in the week. For some strange reason, it tasted like vodka-flavored lasagna so I abandoned it and stumbled off (literally) to retrieve my senior exam reviews from a professor. Of course, I missed the 10 AM class on account of being unable to coordinate getting dressed in less than forty minutes. Most of the time I knelt next to my bed and bitched about my miserable hangover.

By the time I reached his office, however, I had the horrifying epiphany that I wasn’t experiencing an extended hangover—I was actually fucking plastered at 11 AM.

Cue awkward, slightly slurred conversation explaining my absence to professor. (Close up on pitying look from said professor, as I offered him a steamy pile of horseshit as an excuse.)

Cut to me back at my dorm at some point eating Cheerios, since I was frustratingly not sober yet and thought little wheat donuts and cow juice would do the trick. Surprise, surprise… the Cheerios tasted like they were soaked in vodka. Original Cheerios still taste like vodka for me to this day.

Next class, I sat in a row by myself, because I reeked of alcohol and didn’t want my academic reputation tarnished. That actually put me in full view of my professor—which was lovely because he could then watch me, completely unobstructed, as I sat there passed the fuck out.

I think I went to the library to study/sleep at that point. Which seemed like a noble thought until vodka lasagna/cheerios decided they weren’t feeling the digestion thing anymore, and wanted out of the deal. So with a burning face, I ended up puking noisily in a water closet (God bless old schools). And I say burning face, ‘cause in the silence of the stacks… some poor soul had to have heard. Admittedly, things were better (read: less drunk) after. But then, I got to experience my first hangover to begin at 8:00 PM so… Yeah.

Anyway, I say all that to say, Svedka is shit and Cheerios are so fucking overrated drunkenness is a sin, y’all. Drink responsibly.

206-ginge:

Incoming wall, brace yourselves.

So I’ve spent the better part of an hour refreshing the Shin A Lam tag on Tumblr and in general being pretty angry and sad about this situation. I watched the video, and it seemed to me like there was almost certainly a timing error on the last point of that match. However, one does not base their opinions off of emotion, but rather information.

Unlike most modern sports with precise timing, fencing appears to not switch to showing tenths of seconds within a minute of a period ending. This makes watching video footage of the clock and making an informed decision about the legitimacy of the time passed a bit difficult. We don’t know if the clock started or not, because if the correct decision was made obviously the clock would not have changed. Instead, we must turn to clocks that DO show us fractions of seconds in order to determine the situation at hand.

Fencing also happens to be one of the most high-tech sports in the world. When something happens in fencing, the referee and the audience are quick to know about it. When a touch is made, one side of the piste lights up with either green or red, depending on which color the fencer is represented by. If an off-target touch is made on a non-scoring area, a gray light is activated. Most importantly for our purposes, if the clock starts or stops, or if a touch is made, a beep is played through some sort of speaker to indicate the action. This means that, in theory, an audio evaluation of the final point should suffice to determine the legitimacy of the timing mechanism.

Above in the picture you see an audio recording of the final point. Here’s a labeled version:

You’re going to have to take my word for it that those are indeed the sounds in the audio file. Also note the peak indicating the start of the clock is larger than the one indicating the touch. This is due to the fact that “Allez!” is a two-syllable word; the additional decibels are from the referee speaking the second syllable. This means that, while I’m fairly certain that the indicated point is indeed where the beep is, it could be anywhere in that peak, really.

The way I recorded the point actually worked out really well in my favor. The touch beep was right on the 7 second mark of the recording. This means that if the first beep was before the six-second mark, the point was indeed valid. We can see from the red line that the beep was at approximately the 6.15-second mark (error range that I previously mentioned being from ~6.10 to ~6.20). Therefore, indeed, less than one second passed from the start of the timer to the touch being registered by the electronics, and Heidemann deserved to be awarded the point.

However, things are a bit more complex than that. You’ll notice I circled the peak created by the referee giving the command “Allez!”, which is the point at which the two fighters are allowed to begin their attacks. My own analysis shows that this peak begins at 5.92, meaning that Heidemann had ~1.08 seconds in which she could legally begin attacking Shin (Korean name, people, I am using both of the family names here). While the timer did not begin with this command, since the timer is not controlled by the referee but by another person, the fighting did, and the fighting therefore lasted more than one second.

I’m not an expert on the rules of fencing, and maybe someone out there who has more expertise than I could shed some light as to which of these two measurements should be considered valid, but in my eyes this was definitely a controversial, but not inherently incorrect decision. While the images of Shin A Lam crying after the match and the GIF of her standing defiantly on the piste had the ability to sway my own emotions towards being on her side, the logical side of the scenario is much more complicated, and it could easily be argued either way. However, those images and GIFs aren’t going to go away, and they certainly are some of the most powerful to ever come out of any Olympic games.

P.S.: We have to remember that these are some of the best officials in the world. They probably did something similar to what I did in the forty-five minute stretch in which the appeals process took place. It wouldn’t surprise me, the audio file stuff took me like five minutes and the image editing took me another five. The other thirty-five could be explained as the judges debating between the two outcomes I mentioned. Let’s remember, this wasn’t a scenario where a reversal would lead to a replay, it was either Heidemann scored in time and won or she ran out of time and Shin won on the advantage given to her by random draw at the beginning of sudden death. The truth resists simplicity.

Spot on. I am more excited and amazed by the creativity of people in tackling this controversy than necessarily finding the correct outcome. I am dismayed to realize such conflicts in ruling and grey area still exist in such a cool sport, however.

midnight-gallery:

WWI facial prosthesis.

(via williamcrisafi)